Phew! Anyone else feel relieved that we have moved into November? Well I certainly do. I found October, or really the last 6 weeks, a beastly slog. I surrendered to October in the end. I had to, despite my initial reluctance and resistance, there really was no other option. I had to trust, let go of the reins just a little and go with the flow.
So I am feeling excited that we have a New Moon November (4th) which promises to usher in new energies and a flush of love and light to shine on us all – which is just what we need in the run up to the Festive Madness.
October, for me, was all about trusting the process, slowing down and listening. While the leaves were dropping from the trees I was dropping away all of the “shoulds”. I surrendered in the end, but it took some getting used to.
I made the decision to work less and stop striving. Now, this doesn’t financially make any sense for me, like many solo-preneurs, I cannot afford to rest on my laurels, if I am not physically promoting myself, working with a client or leading a workshop, then there ain’t no magical flow of money coming through the door. However, the guidance from the universe was pretty fierce. STOP STRIVING. For the last 7 years I have pretty much just woken up in the morning and worked, managing to take random days off here and there with no set pattern or structure. So now I am trying really hard to actually take weekends off! (with the exception of the 2 weekends that I am teaching Reiki for the remainder of the year).
In this surrendering I managed to create a lot of space which was actually quite scary. I’ve realized that I don’t even know what my hobbies are anymore because my love for plants and herbs is so enmeshed in my work. After what seems like a long time I’ve picked up my pens, pencils and brushes again to start doodling with colour and form. I’ve even opened some recipe books – because all those years ago (before I started working for myself) I used to love cooking and entertaining.
I started taking my own advice…boy was it brilliant!
The most exciting revelation of all my October project of surrendering was that I actually really started being nice to myself. I actually listened when my head hurt and said “No more computer stuff” and went and read a book or took a walk with my dog. I actually listened to my body and joined a yoga class and have been a whole 3 times. (and I hate yoga…but my body loves it so I force myself to do it). I also even treated myself for massage. So yes, I started treating myself like a precious object and prioritized my self care. Which is exactly the rhetoric which I reiterate time and time again to all of my clients. I started taking my own advice… boy was it brilliant!
The space I created ushered in my voice. That soul voice that comes from that deep place of knowing, the place of authority that only each of us have the keys to within our self. So from all the surrendering, all the stopping and pausing, all the time and space that I created, I had the opportunity to deeply listen. Mostly I was just waiting, patiently waiting with my heart and ears open, holding space to allow what needed to flow through to enter and fully land. This new sound, this deepness, this real me, my soul voice, is coming, is flowing in its gentle own way. The ego wants it all through to come at once, like a thunder clap and lightning bolt, here to change the world. The soul knows to wait, to patiently wait while my intuitive voice and unique way of being feels its way into this new space. I trust what is coming is good.
Come on November, I have made space for you.
Blessings for your November, let me know how things are for you X
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